So many questions plague us as parents.
When will this baby sleep through the night? How many mittens can one child lose? Did this child really just say that to me? Is the dryer actually an evil cyborg who is building an army of unmatched socks to take over the world? Ok – that last one may just be me. But really, where else can these socks be getting to?
But anyways.
Parents, amidst the responsibilities of keeping children fed, washed, well-rested, and in mismatched but clean socks, ask themselves the big question: How do I raise good kids?
And while “good” is subjective — with the low bar being not sociopaths and the high bar being resilient, emotionally balanced, self-sufficient decent humans – Black parenting experts offer some of the best advice on raising our kids.
Black parenting experts give practical advice that is for us.
This world is wildly different from the one I grew up in. My parenting style is wildly and intentionally different than my parent’s parenting style. I hope.
Not only are we out here dealing with teething, breastfeeding and tantrums, but Black parents have other layers to think about. That is just facts. It’s not just the unique challenges we face. Just anyone doesn’t understand the joys, cultural expectations, and lived experience that are unique to us.
When I google parenting advice much advice seems to come from folks who don’t share my lived experience. At this point in the parenting game, I’ve learned that expert advice that doesn’t factor in what it is to parent in our skin isn’t really advice.
I mean I’m over here raising a Queen who loves herself. I can’t ignore that our world is filled with those who try to dull her shine and adultify her .
Meanwhile, my young would-be King needs to believe in himself. I have to stay ready for the day when the world thinks he’s moved from toddler to terrifying.
And, I don’t need either one to end up a cautionary tale, or worse be added to the ‘Black List’.
I’ve learned that ‘expert advice’ that doesn’t factor in what it is to parent in our skin isn’t really advice.
Personally, I am raising my kids differently than how I was raised. Doing the work to break generational curses and cultural ‘givens’ about how to raise children should not be done solo. Especially when you add to this the exhausting work of trying to decipher Niceness or Nonsense when it comes to my kid’s experience in school.
I need more than “influencers” in this journey, I need expert advice.
These inspiring parenting experts come to hold us up when we need it. Some are note famous folks, but they are experts in all things us. They are out here making us laugh, think and rethink when necessary. Most have invaluable insights because they understand being a Black parent is complex. They freely share tools, sage advice and resources to help us navigate a parenting journey unique to us and our children.
Advice matters right from the start of our parenting journey
Black motherhood is not like any other kind of motherhood. Society underrepresents, underrates, and misunderstands Black mothers. I can’t raise the flag for my sisters in motherhood enough because frankly, I’m not sure anyone else is out here doing it, so I will.
Right from the start of our parenting journey, several experts are there to guide us through our unique experiences as new moms and dads in person and online!
Mamadinya
It’s been many years since I gave birth, and I’m still regularly watching the rants and genius videos by midwife Mamadinya. Also known as Elizabeth Idowu, Mamadinya is a dedicated healthcare professional. She uses her extensive experience as a health care assistant, nurse, and midwife to create high-quality content that is as educational as it is entertaining Her style of open dialogue will have you laughing, reminiscing, excited or having learned a little something. If you’re lucky enough to be in the UK, she offers birthing classes in London! I can’t imagine how she would have you laughing yourself into labour.
@mamadinya Sis, do what you need to do 😂😂😘😘 #fyp #mamadinya #mamaspregnancyclass #pregnancy #firsttimemum #antenatal #labourandbirth #labouranddelivery #postnatal #betteroutthanin ♬ original sound – Mamadinya
Side note: If you haven’t decided to get a midwife or need help planning your birthing experience, these websites are closer to home and offer a safe space for Black mothers to learn and explore their options.
Ancestral Hands Midwives
For those truly starting their parenting journey, Ancestral Hands midwives offer resources to advance Black maternal health care. They have a goal of reducing racial disparities in maternal outcomes and improving the experience of care for Black people during the perinatal period. Their site offers invaluable information and access to a caring circle of support.
Diversity Midwives
Diversity midwives’ mission is to keep inclusiveness as a top priority they serve a variety of diverse clientele. They have a team-based approach with midwives who show great compassion for patients. Their Instagram account provides access to a supportive community and information resources.
Gentle parenting, mental health resources and everything in between
Regardless of a child’s age, their parents’ ability to learn and grow through all stages of their life has profound implications. Regardless of current events or if you’re on your first child or seventh, successful Black parenting means being ready to evolve. From diapers to high school and everything in between the resources offered by these Black parenting experts help us to grow as our children do.
Yolanda Williams, Parenting Decolonized
Yolanda Williams is the mother behind Parenting Decolonized. In her words, she is a self-described single mom, racial justice educator, and Positive Discipline Coach who offers tools for parents looking to raise the next generation of emotionally well, liberated, free-thinkers and in the process. This is not for the faint of heart, there is some heavy lifting for those looking for help strengthening their relationship with their children. SYolanda also unapologetically dedicates herself to serving the Black parenting community. She celebrates our culture and beauty as often as possible.
If you’re looking for hands-on learning, her Conscious Parenting for the Culture Facebook family is an online lifeline. This is especially true for those of us whose family network may not understand or offer help in our conscious parenting journey. Yolanda’s site and Facebook page are rich resources. I have found it particularly helpful as a sounding board for things specific to raising teenage children.
Brandon Hay, Black Daddies Club
A through and through Daddy’s girl myself, I search for solid representations of Black fatherhood. The picture painted of a Black father’s love is not one we see enough of. If we only see ourselves through the mainstream narrative, well, we won’t see ourselves. But that’s why we can be grateful for Black Daddies Club. The collective brings together, celebrates and offers resources for Black fathers.
Trina Greene, Parenting for Liberation
As a proud Black feminist Mama-activist, Trina Greene founded Parenting for Liberation to support Black parents heal from & interrupt intergenerational violence. Her Blog Parenting for Liberation offers stories and insights to help Black parents build resilient and joyful Black families in community. Trina’s writing has been featured in “On Parenting” for the Washington Post, Essence magazine, LA Parent Magazine, and anthologies. Her book “Parenting for Liberation: A Guide for Raising Black Children” debuted on Juneteenth 2020 by Feminist Press.
Parents of Black Children
Parents of Black Children’s website describes itself as an advocacy group working to support families and facilitate equitable outcomes for Black children, through accountability and transformational change. I describe them as experts in all things related to Black school-aged children. They offer support and are a great resource for parents of school aged children.
Dr. Traci Baxley, Social Justice Parenting
Dr. Traci Baxley is a professor of education who has spent 30 years teaching diversity and inclusion. A mother of five children Dr Baxley sees parenting as a form of activism. She encourages dialogue that starts early with children and leans on parents’ influence in developing compassionate, socially conscious kids.
Dr. Dawn Kamilah Brown, Dr. Dawn, MD
Known as the MD with ADHD, Dr. Dawn was diagnosed with ADHD herself during her early 30’s. As a result, she has a unique understanding of the frustrations surrounding treatment and the need for compassionate, ongoing support. She passionately advocates for folks to get properly diagnosed with ADHD. Her ADHD Wellness Center is located in Texas, so unless you’re heading there, you can find several important resources for parents on her Instagram page and YouTube channel. For me, the must-listen episode 7 Signs Your Daughter May Have ADHD helped me to better understand my son’s ADHD and supported an essential discussion with the educators in his life.
Muffy Mendoza, Brown Mamas
Blogger and writer Muffy Mendoza’s offers us Brown Mamas. This site is a multi-generational community of Black mothers and a safe space that puts Black moms first. She works to amplify the voices and lived experiences of Black moms with innovative programs empowering women – specifically Black mothers – to lead in the communities they care for. Specifically, her Brown Mama Mindset Curriculum helps Black moms do the work on their journey toward fulfilled emotional, mental and social wealth.
Special mentions for Black educators
I have to give a quick shout out to a few folks. WIth many of our kids in traditional school settings, Black parents spend a lot of time navigating the education system. These folks offer resources that can help bring to life important lessons that many of our kids might otherwise miss out on.
Colour Their World
Erica London, the Founder of Colour Their World, Creates writes books and offers products, and services that give young children the ability to feel seen. She proudly creates weekly YouTube content that presents authors from around the world and celebrates uniqueness. If you are in Ontario, she has worked with many school boards to offer in-school workshops including creative writing and read-along programs.
Brownie Points Teaching
Nicole Brown is a primary teacher and the face behind Brownie Points Teaching. Nicole’s love of education shines through in her blog and she offers resources that are invaluable for parents. If you’re hoping to expand your child’s exposure to Black history beyond Black History Month the site offers resources and activities for educators and parents looking to help their children embrace Black history and cultures from around the world all year round.
Here Wee Read
Charnaie Gordon is a Children’s book author, blogger, literacy advocate and content creator who loves to help parents and their littles engage in all things reading. Charnaie’s Instagram account promotes books from diverse authors and for readers at many levels.
Parenting is a tall order.
Parenting is a lot. Personally, I’ve survived all the outbursts, tantrums and “back talk” experts assure me are necessary to help my children become emotionally well-regulated adults.
Well, mostly, cuz like they are teenagers and we are working through some ish.
But I don’t know if I could have done it without some of the wisdom and humour shared by these folks.
If I’m missing anyone – drop them in the comments! I love to hear about Black parenting experts, especially those Canadian folks.
