The screen time beast seems to be a new and worthy adversary for parents.
I remember the good old days when parents freaked out about letting our kids play violent video games. We felt that first-person shooter games and misogynist content were harmful to children and the young adults they would become.
But since then studies suggest that playing violent games has little to do with a child growing up to commit violent acts. Children can repeatedly beat their video game rivals bloody and it doesn’t increase the likelihood of them becoming bloodthirsty maniacs in real life.
We can fondly recollect that time when video game screens were the only ones that held our children’s attention.
Now it seems like screens and technology are a pervasive part of a child’s everyday existence. The challenge isn’t just what they are consuming it’s how long they are spending on screens.
For parents, it’s become next to impossible to limit children’s screen time to what science suggests is an optimal amount. Particularly during the pandemic when screens provided many kids with their only safe connection to the outside world.
Too much screen time or not too much screen time? That is now the question.
What defines a “screen” and how much screen time are kids supposed to have?
SickKids Hospital researchers define “screen time” as the amount of time a child spends using any device with a screen. They lay out that this means not only video game screens but televisions, tablets, computers and smartphones.
The Canadian Pediatric Society has specific recommendations for how much time children should spend on all screens per day. While guidelines do make room for engaging content like educational programming, for each age group CPS recommends:
- For children under two years old screen time is not recommended;
- Kids ages two to five should have less than one hour of screen time;
- Over the age of five children’s screen time should be less than two hours a day.
How much screen time are our kids actually getting?
Data collected over the pandemic suggests most kids are spending triple the recommended amount of time on screens.
According to the CDC’s screen time report, in the US, children aged 8-10 are actually spending six hours a day in front of screens for entertainment. Teens ages 15-18 spend nearly 7.5 hours a day on screens. Kids between the ages of 11-14 spend 9 hours a day in front of a screen.
These numbers do not include kids’ time on screen for educational purposes.
While these numbers are out of the US, I’m pretty sure we don’t fair much better north of the border. Also since these numbers do not include screens for educational purposes, I am also sure that number is a gross underestimate.
Considering all the screens in our kids lives, this number is definitely higher.
But even if we take it at face value, this means our children spend on average 7.5 hours in front of a screen for entertainment each day.
This adds up to our kids spending 114 days a year watching a screen for fun.
On average children between 8-18 spend 114 days a year watching a screen for fun.
Why are kids getting so much screen time?
For most parents, it’s hard to imagine living within the recommended guidelines for children’s screen time.
For younger kids, it may be possible, just because it’s easier to limit younger children’s access to screens. They get screen time while we cook, shop for groceries, run errands, do yard work, or finish up work projects.
Screens and tablets provide the hour or two of peace parents need to get things done. It doesn’t hurt that screen time isn’t our only tool for distraction. Younger kids also still love to play with toys and be outside.
As they get older, limiting kids’ access to screens to the recommended amount just seems plain unrealistic. Mainly because children’s access to and interest in screens increases exponentially as they get older.
In Canada, only 39 percent of kids between the ages of two and six report using a mobile phone. However, that number rises to 50 percent for children between the ages of seven and 11.
By the time kids are 12-18 a whopping 87 percent report using mobile phones. 81 percent of Canadian children between 12-18 have their own mobile device.
81 percent of Canadian children between 12-18 have their own mobile device.
Screen time at school counts too.
And that’s just phones. Screen time use numbers exclude the time children spend on devices at school. They probably should not.
Many elementary schools can keep mobile phone use in check during the day. Most kids are accustomed to surrendering their phones to their teachers until tech breaks.
That said, many of those same schools routinely show movies in class and have children exclusively complete and submit assignments online.
Students routinely use Chromebooks, create PowerPoint presentations, read textbooks online and use the web to complete research. They connect throughout the day playing games on their phones. Plus many use social media to communicate with friends and YouTube to watch stuff their parents don’t let them see at home.
As teens, specifically high schoolers, there is almost no schoolwork that doesn’t involve a screen. The expectation is that teens routinely, if not exclusively, use screens to access their education and complete the vast majority of school projects.
Everything from textbooks, study guides, and homework is provided to them, to be read and submitted online. High schoolers are expected to spend an average of 20-30 minutes per day per subject on homework. In grades 9-12, most students have four subjects they are working on.
For teens to meet recommendations, they would need to use their screen time almost exclusively for schoolwork.
Goodbye Snap Chat.
Is screen time a problem for us?
Most experts in child development seem to think excess screen time – which again is anything more than 2 hours per day of screen time – is a problem.
AboutKidsHealth is a health education website powered by SickKids Hospital. Its reports link excessive screen time to everything from poorer mental health and lowered physical activity to weakened social skills.
There have been notable cases of bullying and predatory behaviour online. As children and teens use screens so pervasively, it is a daunting, if not impossible, challenge for parents to ensure every moment their child spends on screen is safe.
Research also suggests a correlation between increased teen usage of social media and lowered self-esteem.
When it comes to kids of colour, the lack of diversity on screens is particularly harmful.
Long-term studies indicate that children of colour show lower self-esteem as a result of on-screen images. Researchers suggest this may be because our kid’s screen time rarely includes images of folks who look like them. And when our kids do see themselves, they see stereotypical portrayals of people of colour, women and other marginalized groups.
Our kids spend a great deal of time watching screens that offer limiting and problematic messages about their identity.
When it comes to kids of colour, the lack of diversity on screens is particularly harmful.
So what do we do?
Most of our children are now conditioned to have a phone, tablet, or computer in front of their face or attached to their hand at almost every waking moment of every day. They use these devices at school and also at almost every social occasion.
Even at parties, kids and teens are on their phones. Most post to socials or even just text with folks they are at the party with instead of talking to them.
It feels pretty impossible to suggest that kids – especially older ones – can be limited to the recommended 2 hours of screen time per day. And the six hours a day people report their kids are online post-pandemic is more like a guilt-ridden lowball estimate.
But if parents are concerned about the time their kids spend online or in front of a screen, it may be time to make some proactive changes.
Get the facts.
The first thing to do is calculate how much time your kids are spending on screens. Most parents have access to tools that can help them to roughly figure this out. There are apps provided by most Internet and mobile phone service providers that allow you to login in and see how much time your kids are spending on the internet or their mobile phone.
We do have to remember that for an accurate calculation, you’ll have to know not just the internet use at home and their mobile phone data but also have some kind of rough idea of the time they spend on screen at school and watching good old-fashioned movies and TV.
Let me tell you, this was an eye-opening experiment for me.
At one point, my kid’s online phone usage alone appeared to be five hours per day. When I added on an estimate for the time they spent online at school and considered their gaming and TV-watching habits, well, let’s say I was not feeling great about my parenting choices.
Talk to your kids.
Once you’ve figured out their screen time, if you’re concerned about it, talk to your kids and see what they say and how they feel.
Make sure not to freak out. Kids are expected to do a lot on screens – screens are an integral part of not only their education but their social life. For some screens may feel central to how they connect with others and relax.
Your child might feel the hours they spend online are justified – especially if they are mainly using screens for homework, listening to music, chatting with friends, or even relaxing with video games.
But if they feel or you notice their time online makes them feel tense, they wish to be less connected, or that they had other ways to spend their time, that could lead to great conversations.
Set the example.
After you check your child’s screen time, check your own.
StatsCan recommends adults limit their recreational screen time to less than 3 hours per day. After I reviewed my phone usage – and considered my Netflix, Facebook, and Instagram scrolling time, I knew I could not judge my children.
I didn’t even dare add up time I banked while working on my computer.
I wanted to set a better example by being more intentional with my own screen time when I was at home. As a start, I followed simple steps and started to create new habits. Just putting my phone in a charger in my study, turning off notifications for a set time in the evenings and never having it while having dinner started lowering my phone time.
As a bonus, I felt more present during the evenings and when I wasn’t working.
Be realistic, but firm.
Some parents try to institute a phone or screen-free zone – be that a time of day or place in their home where screens are not welcome. Others try to provide alternatives to screen time – this might mean doing something with your child like baking or cooking – (Keeping in mind that to avoid screen time you’d have to go old school and print out a recipe or use an actual cookbook…).
Maybe go for a walk or a drive when you feel the need to connect to a screen.
It may seem to defeat the purpose, but also being realistic might mean choosing to engage in screen time as a family. Sure watching a movie together might be screen time, but it gives you something to talk about after it’s over.
Maybe the rule is that during family movie time, no one (including mom and dad) is allowed their phone or to text and is encouraged to commit to conversations in the room rather than online.
Redirect.
I’ve always found bribery to be an effective tool in my parenting arsenal. And yeah, I admit it, when I wanted my kids to spend time off tech, I had to get creative. Especially when it came to the one who “hates” to read.
For the kid who loves to read, it’s easy to find books, blankets, or other things to encourage their habit. I admit to using items on my own gift list to create a space where we can read, play games and hang out offline together. For the aspiring artist, indulge in an art or creation set from the dollar store.
Maybe a games night is more your speed. I have yet to meet a kid who doesn’t like UNO or Family Charades. A night filled with games and snacks not usually permitted can distract most kids from their tech. The point is, find something other than tech you and your child loves and centre that.
If you sense your child might really love tech, you may be wise to give up fighting screen time and embrace it.
For the true tech-minded kid, if they are going to be on tech, they may want to know how it works. Several toys for younger and older kids teach them about tech, robotics, and programming. Many options teach kids how to edit films and photos. For older kids, programs like Black boys code and technical March Break or Summer camps offer exceptional programs.
Some parents might be wiser to embrace their kid’s tech obsession as a learning opportunity rather than run from it.
For Black children decreasing screen time can increase self-esteem.
My big takeaway is that kids having screen time every day isn’t something most parents can avoid altogether. Between school, leisurely fun, and even socializing, screens have become an integral part of our day-to-day.
The mental and physical impacts of screen time can’t be negated. For Black children, reducing screen time might also reduce the negative messages they are getting about their identity.
Parents can feel better about this seemingly all-consuming force in our children’s lives if we take some action. Get a solid understanding of exactly how much time our kids spend on screen, the possible messages they are getting, and a way to work with them to manage it.
Share in the comments how you manage your child’s screen time in your home.
